NEW YORK—Sending a clear message that taking advantage of company time would not be tolerated, human resources officer Abigail Styner warned employees Tuesday against taking unsanctioned 8-hour naps every night while working from home. “We try to give our employees a lot of leeway in terms of how they structure their days, but taking six- to eight-hour naps every day is unacceptable,” said Styner, explaining that some workers were found to be unreachable for long periods of time, usually between the hours of 10 p.m. and 6 a.m. the next day. “We completely understand if someone is sick and needs to take a 15-minute break, but an entire third of the day is abusing our company policy. It’s important that our employees establish a healthy work–life balance, but it shouldn’t have a negative impact on productivity.” At press time, Styner was sending out a firm warning about the inappropriateness of at-home employees having sex in their place of work.

The 9 to 5 Cult

    Private Governments (Corporations), Wagecucks, Wage Slavery, Modern Day Feudalism, Urban Plantations (Offices)